What Game Are You Playing?
Everywhere we go, we meet people of faith carrying the same heavy questions about church and faith, often centered around decline and deconstruction:
Why does decline feel inevitable?
Why do our programs not work?
Many are quietly asking: What are we doing?
And underneath all of that is a deeper question. One we almost never say out loud, but one we think we need to start honestly asking:
What game are we actually playing?
“You don’t win or lose the infinite game, you just keep playing as long as you can.”
The Default Game
If we’re honest, most churches have been playing the same game for decades:
How do we get more people to come on Sunday?
How do we get more people to volunteer more?
How do we get more people to give more money?
How do we get more people to… [fill in the blank]
That’s the scoreboard. That’s the strategy.
And sure, it’s a game you can play. It’s measurable. It’s competitive. There are “winners” (look at those numbers!) and “losers” (ugh, empty pews).
But even if you’re winning, it’s exhausting. It keeps leaders anxious, keeps congregations comparing themselves, and keeps neighbors at arm’s length because they are seen more as potential attendees than beloved co-creators.
Geez. No wonder so many of us feel tired and disillusioned!
A Different Way to Play (Or… Not Play at All)
But here’s the good news: that’s not the only option.
The Kingdom of God isn’t a finite game.
It’s what you might call an infinite game where the point isn’t to win but to keep showing up, to keep playing. To love, to heal, to be present in your neighborhood as long as you can.
And maybe even more truthfully: maybe church was never supposed to be a game at all.
Because the moment we drop the scoreboard, we’re free to ask new questions:
What does faithfulness look like on this block, with these neighbors?
Where is God’s renewal already bubbling up around us?
How can we join in not as performers, but as participants?
Name the Game
Here’s the invitation: name the game you’ve been playing.
If your main goal is to get more people in the pews, cool. Just own it.
But that’s not our thing. As Parish Collective, we want you to know: the finite game isn’t what we’re here to help you play.
It’s important to name the game because once you name it, you might realize what you’ve really been longing for all along is not to win, but to belong.
The Real Question
So instead of asking, “How do we get more people to come?”
What if we asked, “How do we keep showing up in the infinite, untamed, unscored work of God’s Kingdom right where we are?”
That shift in perspective is more than just a leadership strategy. It’s a reorientation of the heart.
Instead of chasing growth for its own sake, we’re invited to:
Drop performance and practice presence.
Stop scrambling to survive and start rooting in renewal.
See our neighbors not as “targets” but as co-dreamers in God’s story for our place.
DISCERN:
What game has your community been playing?
And what might it look like to stop playing altogether and join instead in God’s steady, neighborhood-level renewal?